{"id":580,"date":"2025-08-17T16:24:38","date_gmt":"2025-08-17T16:24:38","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.viewscopes.com\/?p=580"},"modified":"2025-08-17T16:24:38","modified_gmt":"2025-08-17T16:24:38","slug":"youre-not-his-free-wi-fi","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.viewscopes.com\/?p=580","title":{"rendered":"You\u2019re Not His Free Wi-Fi"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p>She gazed at him like he was her whole world.<br>He stared at his phone like it was his.<br>If you\u2019re not the one in his eye, stop orbiting him like you\u2019re the free Wi-Fi.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>She gazed at him like he was her whole world.He stared at his phone like it was his.If you\u2019re not the one in his eye, [&#8230;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":581,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[3],"tags":[4],"class_list":["post-580","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-humour","tag-humour"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.viewscopes.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/580","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.viewscopes.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.viewscopes.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.viewscopes.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.viewscopes.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=580"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/www.viewscopes.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/580\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":582,"href":"https:\/\/www.viewscopes.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/580\/revisions\/582"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.viewscopes.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/581"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.viewscopes.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=580"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.viewscopes.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=580"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.viewscopes.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=580"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}